Domestic Violence and the Holidays: A NY Safety Guide

The holiday season is supposed to be a time for family, but for many households it also brings added pressure: money worries, more drinking, crowded homes, travel, and time off from work and school. For someone living with an abusive partner or family member, these stresses can make an already unsafe situation worse. If you are worried about your safety this season, there are steps you can take now.

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For free, confidential help 24 hours a day, call the New York State Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline at 1-800-942-6906, text 844-997-2121, or chat at opdv.ny.gov. In New York City, you can also call 1-800-621-HOPE (4673) or 311.

Make a safety plan before the holidays

A safety plan is a set of practical steps you can take if things escalate. Consider:

• Identifying a safe place to go and how you would get there, including at relatives' homes you may be visiting
• Keeping important documents (IDs, birth certificates, immigration papers, insurance cards, and any orders of protection), some cash, and a phone charger where you can grab them quickly, or with someone you trust
• Agreeing on a code word with a friend or family member that means "call for help"
• Saving hotline numbers in your phone under a name that will not draw attention

A hotline advocate can help you build a plan that fits your situation, including plans for children and pets. Help is available in most languages.

Holiday custody exchanges

Holiday visitation schedules can put you in contact with an abusive co-parent. If you have concerns:

• Review your custody or visitation order now, not on the day of the exchange, so you know exactly what it requires
• Consider asking that exchanges happen at a neutral, public location
• If your children's safety is at risk during visits, Family Court can order supervised visitation
• If you have an order of protection, bring a copy with you

If you already have an order of protection

Keep a copy with you, especially at family gatherings where the other person may show up. If the order is violated, you can call the police or file a violation petition in Family Court. A violation can be prosecuted as criminal contempt.

If you need an order of protection

You can file a family offense petition in Family Court on any day the court is open. There is no filing fee, and a judge can issue a temporary order of protection the same day. If you need protection when Family Court is closed, call the police or the hotline about your options. Learn more in our guide, How to Get an Order of Protection in New York.

We are here to help

Maxwell Law Group, PLLC represents clients in New York Family Court, including family offense, custody, and visitation matters. Through our Emotional Support Family Toolkit, we also connect families with counseling and emotional support resources during difficult legal proceedings. Contact us to schedule a free consultation.

This article provides general information about New York law and is not legal advice. Reading it does not create an attorney-client relationship.